Missed Targets

"Kaempress!! is that you? Oh my goodness! don't you change?? " An ecstatic Wahid called out to me before pulling me into his arms for a hug. It had been almost eight years since we last met. He was bubbly as always, he was looking correct and his charm had grown. We met at the bus stop and quickly established we were headed in the same direction. Wahid has what we call 'a no filter mouth' if you don't know him and have no sense of humour you will take offence with all he says. A crowd is building up at the bus stop there are no buses and everyone is looking to the direction the buses will come from in the hope to spot one early enough and strategise on how to board among the first lot of people.  Several buses come and the need to shove and push in order to board is no longer there. We stand back and let the passengers on board to alight, I nudge Wahid to show him a pickpocket struggling to get into a certain ladies hand bag. We try to signal her but it is too late he grabs something and takes off fast! The woman screams and the drivers,members of the public and conductors break into a ran after the thief. Wahid curiously follows the crowd to see what the thief had stolen.

The urchin slips into an alley and Wahid is the only one who notices this by now the crowd chasing him had given up and started to walk back to the bus stop consoling the victim of this theft as she walks away sad " Kaempress you won't bloody believe what grown men were chasing that thief for !" Wahid amidst laughter tells me..curious, I ask him "What? come on tell me!!" He was struggling to hold in his laughter " Ilikuwa ni chapati na yai! bwahahaha wanaume wametoka mbio kumfata mwizi wa chapati wakidhani ni wallet'' (It was a chapati and an egg! hahahaha men went chasing a chapati thief thinking it was a wallet) We laughed and I noticed a young lady joining in the laughter as we were boarding the bus. We ended up at the very back seat and she followed us clearly smitten by Wahid. She was a very beautiful young woman who was clearly aware of her looks. "Excuse me can I seat close to the window? I get car sick'' she asked looking at Wahid who was sitting near the window. Being the gentleman he always is he excused her and he was now sitting sandwiched between us. "Can I have your number?' he asked her. As if she had been waiting ' 072..... Sally ' Wahid saved it and went on to show me photos of his triplets. He spoke with such pride I could not control my smile." My baby and I are very playful like you know now we have babies and they are just as playful you should see us when we get home! gym tosha!' Sally was not the least bit amused that he took her number and ignored her and started to talk about his family. In a very sarcastic tone "Una Bibi kumbe?" (so you have a wife?) Wahid who is very loud by nature laughed out and said " si Bibi tu ! soul mate haswa!' ( Not just a wife! My soul mate to be precise!) 

"I own an advertising agency. We scout for models and you have a face for an advert I am working on" Wahid said in an attempt to explain why he took her number. As he showed her some of the adverts he was involved in I got a call from my man. I was smiling so big and I forgot there were people around me I was blushing like a sixteen year old. "Kaempress you so darn secretive! ehe spill! who was that? and am I meeting him? '' I wanted him to lower his voice but knowing Wahid that just a wish that I was not going to get. I responded in a low tone. "That's my man. You will meet him soon since we shall come visit your babies'' He wanted to show me something so he asked sally to hold a gift bag he was holding for him, he then proceeded to lift his shirt. I was scandalised! we are on a bus and he is shamelessly lifting his shirt to show me God knows what! " I got me a nice tattoo of my babies' Initials and another of my initials and wifey. I am heading to her office to show her and surprise her with a gift'' I could not help but smile so hard. It is hard not to like Wahid he just lives life so simply no complications he says what he feels or thinks freely and does what he wants without worry of judgement he is a free spirit. Suddenly Sally shouts to the bus conductor " na shuka hio stage'' (I am alighting at the next  bus stop and hurriedly shoves past us stepping on Wahid and hitting my head with her elbow as she was hurrying to exit. 

I had not composed myself after trying to rub my forehead to soothe the pain from Sally's elbow kick, when I heard Wahid laugh hysterically." Aki ya mama! mwanamke si sura! hako kachizi kameniibia !''(I swear by  Mama! a woman is not her looks but her manners! that crazy one has stolen from me!)given how loud he is half the bus was looking towards us curious what had been stolen. Was it something so expensive that shock was making him laughor was it something ridiculous? "Empress Kapienga! hahahaha! What?! Me and my mama like to prank each other so I bought her a phone and pads so I took out the pads from the pack and put them in the phone box and put the phone along with some stuffing into the pads' pack! crazy gal stole the the pads!'' Everyone in the bus burst into laughter luckily we had come to our destination. I like to call this guy 'Wahid chizi '(crazy Wahid) never a dull moment around him.